Gentlemen, this one is for you. At least half my coaching clients are men – business owners, directors, leaders and professionals.
One of them was telling me yesterday about two recent conversations with male friends of his about their challenges around stress and mental health. He was feeling really good about the fact that they could be having these conversations at all. Of course, those conversations also turned to coaching and what support there was out there, and he reflected on how so often it’s perceived as a weakness to need to reach out for help, or to even admit that we might not be holding it together.
I hear it so often from people that they are convinced everyone around them is coping fine and they’re the only one who’s stressed or feeling like they’re about to lose their sh*t.
This is never the case and stress is everywhere. Unfortunately.
What I believe and have experienced for myself personally, is that it’s both brave and wise to reach out for help, to admit what’s going on and to embark on a process of change.
It actually isn’t the easy route because we must face ourselves and what feels like the unknown, but even if we think it’s going to be horrendously messy, shameful and hard, often it is in fact relieving, liberating, empowering, sometimes downright fascinating – and it’s sure as heck worth every ounce of effort and courage.
I say this from my own personal experience and journey, but it’s also echoed in my clients time and time again.
It takes courage to put your hand up.
I think particularly in New Zealand, many people consider hiring a coach to be not only a sign of weakness, but also rather indulgent, perhaps even selfish for spending that time and money on yourself instead of your family or whoever.
And yet, I’ve lost count of the number of dads that I’ve worked with who have got their stress levels down at work, curbed their short fuse, or finally learned how to fill up their own tank so that they have more energy and capacity for others at the end of the day and for the weekend.
I’ve lost count of the number of female leaders in business I’ve worked with who, through de-stressing or building their confidence or strengthening their voice, have not only achieved more at work, but also strengthened their relationships at home.
There is no way you can transform on the inside – personally or professionally (although it’s all personal in my experience) – without changing the world around you.
I hope this might just inspire at least one person to tell somebody else how they’re feeling.
Let yourself be where you are, whether it’s high stress, exasperation, fury, depression or plain old exhaustion.
I’m telling you now, you’re not the only one.
You’re not alone.
There is no shame in being in any of these states.
You can and deserve to have the support you need.
To borrow my clients’ words – there is no weakness in reaching out, it’s actually a show of strength.
And it might just be the beginning of the rest of a fabulous life.
I offer a free initial call to explore where you’re at and what you’d like to have different. Book your FREE 60 min NEW VISION CALL to help you connect with where you really want to be and how you can start getting there. It’s a confidential no-obligation conversation. BOOK YOUR SPOT HERE.