Do you ever wonder if you’re supposed to want so much? If you’re wanting the wrong things, or if you should just be satisfied with what you already have?
I remember hearing “be happy with what you’ve got” as a child – with a “don’t be greedy” ring to it. I often hear people today expressing guilt for wanting more than they have, or what I call “thriver’s guilt” for already having more than someone else.
It’s all quite illogical when you step back from it. There will always be people with more than you and others with less, whether it’s loving relationships, work opportunities, money, or even apples in the fridge.
What really matters is what you have that’s meaningful to you. If you don’t even like apples, why care how many someone else has?
That’s why I think envy or jealousy can actually be momentarily helpful – they show us what we’d like in our own lives. It’s only when we dwell in them that they become toxic – first to ourselves, and often to the people we project them onto.
I digress … let’s talk about having desires. Are they really healthy? Are we meant to want things?
Are desires healthy?
This question becomes even more important as we age and mature or deepen spiritually. Our values evolve, our wants shift, and sometimes we question whether we’re meant to keep reaching for more. This reflection is natural and often clarifying, even leading to a more fulfilling life. But it can also tip into an existential crisis about whether we should stop wanting altogether.
I’ve been there, and it’s not pretty.
Experiencing Oneness and feeling complete within yourself is sublime, but we live in a physical, dynamic world. We’re here to experience the full gamut of life: the physical, the spiritual, and yes, ice creams on the beach.
The nature of desire
Despite what some old spiritual or religious teachings say, desire itself isn’t unholy or greedy. It’s a natural impulse that fuels our growth and flourishing. The nature of our entire natural world and that of the universe is infinite, ever expanding, suffused with non-stop possibility.
It makes sense even if you just turn to nature for a moment and watch a tree: Imagine if it decided, after one glorious autumn, never to grow leaves again. That’s absurd, right? Its impulse is to renew, to be lush and abundant once more. It will reach for sunlight and water, and flourish without apology. That’s its nature.
And we are nature too.
We’re designed to grow and expand – to create, to reach, to experience.
So, is it okay to want what you want?
You bet it is. It turns out, your desires are how your soul calls you forward. They’re not just things to get and enjoy (as per your natural abundant existence); they’re invitations to evolve. Desires are an impulse from your higher self and they are designed to help you reach higher. Not because you should, but because you can.
Years ago, I wrote about how our work journey is part of our spiritual journey. Time and again, I saw clients reaching for something new – a role, a business, a shift in direction – and inevitably growing into a higher version of themselves to meet it. What they perceived as challenges or setbacks were often the path unfolding or clearing itself for them.
In the past year alone, I’ve worked with clients navigating staff changes, tricky suppliers, redundancies, new markets, new hires, start-ups, and business growth. Every one of these ‘problems’ became a portal to new strength and capacity. They were powerful opportunities to upskill, but most importantly, to step into new levels of being within themselves.
The up-levelling has been epic.
Our aspirations call us into a higher expression of ourselves – and do you notice they also do that for those around us, those who also get the opportunity to step into a higher expression of themselves?
That’s why I believe we must get comfortable visioning the richness of our lives and going for it.
It serves everyone.
Getting to the heart of desires
I could write about this all day, but what I really wanted was to get to the heart of what it means to have desires, and to clear the path for you to connect with yours.
So, I asked my guides, the higher beings I channel, to share their perspective on this topic. I’ll be sharing more of their channellings in future, as they often bring in entirely new (and usually profound!) insights.
What follows is a direct channelling from them.
________
Guides:
“Your desires play a key role in your experience on Earth, as they allow you to manifest with your own Free Will that which you desire to experience, see, have, be, and do.
Of course, they invariably encourage you or require you to step into a new way of being, or new directions, or learn a new skill, or experience new things with different people.
And all of this, of course, causes growth and revelation.
Desire is godly. It is of the Divine. It was placed in you – placed in your heart. Your heart wasn’t only created to love what you already have, but to know in advance of something you wish for. Tto know what your heart feels called to. To let your heart call you towards what is meant for you.
Perhaps you had not seen it that way before, but your heart runs ahead of you in a way.
It calls you to your true calling – to the higher expression of who you are. It knows what’s best and will sometimes confuse the mind that is trying to apply logic to some of the things you wish for that seem perhaps so out of reach, unimportant, and often different to what others think you should be aspiring to.
But your heart knows your soul’s unique blueprint.
It knows what you are capable of – what your soul is capable of – and who you really are.
So, the heart really is the best guide for aspirations. Your mind may play a helpful role in taking practical steps towards these things, but even then, your heart often guides you to the next step, as does the Divine.
And, so often in the journey, these things arrive in unexpected ways or unconventional ways. This is why many law of attraction and manifestation teachings talk about letting go of the ‘how’, and to not hold tightly to a fixed, rigid plan of steps. This does not mean you mustn’t take any steps, or that you’re not meant to do anything. Of course, taking action is part of your path, and your heart will guide you on this. Allow your mind to be a servant to the heart. In this way, you cannot go wrong.
Allow your mind to be a servant to the heart. In this way, you cannot go wrong.
Your desires are a vehicle for your full soul’s expression in this life. When you have the relationship you desire, or the work experience you’ve been wanting, whether it is a new job, a promotion, or a new business, it invites you to step into a new version of yourself. And if you continue to desire as your soul’s calling, you will continue to step into new versions of yourself; ever new, evolving in the most colourful ways.
So, please do not be deterred when the going gets tough. Trust yourself to carve out a path through it, and to elevate in whatever ways are important at that time, in order to meet the moment, meet the challenge, or what the situation is calling you to do or be.
This is well within your capacities, or your soul would not have called you into the situation.
It is a truth that you are not given anything you cannot handle.
A useful affirmation for this is:
I can handle this. I was given it.
I can handle this. I was given it.
I can handle this. I was given it.
And if you want to take it an octave higher and bring more strength into it, you could also say:
My soul knows I can handle this.
My soul knows I can handle this.
My soul knows I can handle this.
Take strength from this knowing, and remind yourself as often as you need to.
As you do this over time, the knowing of this will be in your bones. You will have embodied it, and it will help you navigate your life with more confidence and strength and courage.
And you will build your capacity for growing into more of who you really are.
You are not given anything you cannot handle.
The ability to grow and step into new levels of your own being is a skill in itself – a set of skills, in fact. How you talk to yourself in those tough moments is one of those skills to hone. Be a good steward of your mind. Speak to yourself with kindness and support every time. Having this higher perspective on your desires, and what is behind your experiences, will support you in this.
There is so much support around you and behind you.
Your soul is continually rooting for you, and your guides and guardians are at your back – always.”
________
Desire is natural. Growth is natural. Expansion is natural.
Let that truth land in your body. Feel how it softens resistance and invites flow.
Reflection questions
If you’d like to reflect more deeply, try journalling on a few of these:
- What came up for you as you read this? Any squeamish moments with old beliefs or emotions stirring? (Make space for them to come up and out, for release).
- What desires have you forgotten or set aside?
- Which ones feel too big, too far away, or “too much”?
- What do you want now that’s different from five or ten years ago?
- When was the last time you put your hand on your heart and asked what you really wish for?
- What’s one desire you’d like to nurture over the next few months? (Spend a few minutes each morning seeing it in your mind’s eye and feeling it already fulfilled.)
If you’re ready to move the needle on what you’re allowing in, I’d love to help.
Here’s what one of my lovely clients, Mark Jacobs, said about our recent work together:
“Without writing a novella, I can’t adequately describe what has occurred within me since we began working together. I was already well into the process of creating my business, but the added professional, experiential, and intuitive insight provided by Karen raised the process to a whole new level. I often felt catapulted.”
I have made space for several three- and six-month coaching clients starting in November.
You can find out more here (especially check out Next Level You), or simply hit reply.
Let’s do this.
Karen x
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